On Finding Friends

 We moved a lot growing up and I went to three different schools just for third grade.  Some people in that situation find themselves very shy and unwilling to make friends because, odds are, you'll move again and have to leave another friend behind. For me it had the opposite effect. 

My step mom called me a social butterfly and at 13 I honestly had no clue what she meant other than butterflies are pretty and people like butterflies. All I know is that I wasted zero time finding a new best friend wherever we went and cementing that relationship into my heart. Instead of worrying over losing that friendship, I decided to enjoy it while I could before the next city brought me another BFF to adventure with. I would try to stay in contact, but in a land before cell phones and Facebook and Instagram, it became impossible. But that's ok because I have the memories.

I will add that since the invention of these things, I've been able to not only maintain, but expand the friendships I thought I would have to leave behind. 

Since becoming a mom though, it's harder and harder to find these friends. Mostly because the candidates I've come across are also moms and mom friendships rarely have time to blossom into full BFF status. Being a social butterfly (still don't fully understand that one but whatevs), I get really moody and melancholy and morose without a BFF. I feel like I have nobody to really connect with on a girl level and I need that. I'm also very physical and some people find that off putting. I'm a hugger, a hand holder, a butt slapper, and I may or may not love to just cuddle with my BFF.

Being LDS and a stay at home mom, my primary adult interaction is at church. Moving into a new ward is much more daunting than a new school. Especially family wards. Some of these people have been here for YEEEAAAARS. They've made lifelong friendships and thus the borderline inappropriate best friend positions have all been filled.

 Sometimes though, I find one. 

I find a curly ginger girl who has the best michigan accent and loves to dance in the back of trucks and could eat gallons of Chubby Hubby ice cream. Who can make me laugh, cry, and scream all during one phone call. Who has always had a kind word on a hard day. A girl who is so incredible and has endured so much, that I still cry for her. 

I find my person in my visiting teaching companion and we share Dr. Pepper and Greys Anatomy and horribly fail at late night spin classes. Who knew exactly how to help without ever being asked and without questioning what was in it for her. A girl who can make you feel like the funniest person on earth with a laugh that is so infectious, we should probably call the cdc on her. 

 I find them and they find me and it just fits. 

And while it's been over two years since I've had that kind of friend next to me, I know that the only way to find them is to be open. To be free. To be happy. 

Because who wants to be best friends with a surly grump?